


the light is blinding my eyes

by imadetheline



Series: Breathe In, Breathe Out [28]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Original Trilogy
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst with a Happy Ending, Darth Vader Lives, Darth Vader Redemption, Death Star (Star Wars), Father-Son Relationship, FebuWhump2021, Gen, Guilt, Kinda, RotJ AU, Self-Pity, Sunshine Luke Skywalker
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-28
Updated: 2021-02-28
Packaged: 2021-03-12 03:34:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,212
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29753442
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imadetheline/pseuds/imadetheline
Summary: febuwhump day twenty-eight - "you have to let me go"
Relationships: Luke Skywalker & Darth Vader
Series: Breathe In, Breathe Out [28]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2140389
Comments: 18
Kudos: 72
Collections: Luke and Vader Bonding, febuwhump 2021





	the light is blinding my eyes

**Author's Note:**

> title from yellow light by of monsters and men
> 
> this is the last prompt but i am going to try to go back and fill in the ones i missed so fingers crossed

Darth Vader watches through lenses flashing with warning signs from his failing body as troopers and officers alike scramble past, for once barely sparing him a glance in their panic. Alarms blare as the metal floor shakes, and his strength is waning, but Vader can’t find the energy to care. Not when his arm is wrapped around his son, his son who is alive and for some reason couldn’t find the propensity to hate him for everything he’s done.

So he stumbles along after him, feet slipping more and more as they cross the hangar. Even in the rising fear and rush of people around them, his and the emperor’s personal ships stand alone, calm pillars tall amidst the madness, no one daring to touch them.

And Luke is strong, but he has already suffered so much, and Vader is too heavy a burden for even him to bear. So as they approach the shuttle ramp, Vader pulls himself from his son, shifting his weight back to legs that almost collapse beneath him, destroyed by electricity that still sparks and burns his skin. 

Luke grabs his arm, stopping him from falling, and tries to tug him forward. But Vader can see the traces of the same lightning etched on Luke’s skin, in jagged scars that creep above his charred collar, snaking up his neck. And he doesn’t think an emotion has ever weighed down on him as heavily as the guilt does then, his lenses flashing warnings that he ignores as he pulls his arm from his son’s grasp and halts unsteadily.

Immediately, Luke stops, a step from the ramp, turning a little too quickly--Vader sees the dizziness crowd his features for a moment before it’s gone, replaced by innocent confusion. And Vader’s mouth tugs up in a wry smile; Luke’s still so young.

“We need to leave, now,” Luke says, gesturing urgently to the ship behind him, and Vader’s eye catches on the prosthetic--just another way he’s hurt one of the few people he was supposed to protect.

“You have to let me go, my son,” he whispers, the vocoder failing and the farthest thing from intimidating it’s ever been.

Luke shakes his head, his eyes--blue, Vader knows--screwed shut. “No, no, you’re coming with me.” His voice is shaky, and the Force is swirling around his emotions, bright in its newfound freedom of the darkness. But Luke’s sorrow feels like the ocean, like the rivers of Naboo Padme had once taken Anakin to, powerful and all-encompassing.

But he’s not Anakin anymore. He’s not Darth Vader anymore either. He’s not sure what he is. So he has to hurt his son this one last time--to grant him and the galaxy a better future.

He reaches out with his left hand, the one not ending in a charred stump, and rests it on Luke’s trembling shoulder, “I am dying. The galaxy is yours now. Let my destruction end here. It is what I deserve.”

Even with the charred and failing systems of his suit, he feels the change in Luke, the tensing of his shoulders, how the Force stops whipping around them, quiet and waiting. The alarms blare around them still, and the hangar is almost empty, but somehow everything seems like it’s stopped, like nothing else matters. 

And then Luke’s eyes open, and Vader’s already unsteady legs almost give out. Luke’s eyes are blazing and bright and  _ blue _ . And Vader can see it. Everything else is still tinted red but somehow Luke’s eyes, bluer than the Tatooine sky, pierce through the haze.

“And what of what I deserve?” Luke half-shouts, the Force frozen with the strength of his righteous anger, the kind that burns. “Do I deserve to lose my father again after I’ve only just found him?”

Vader tries to speak even as his heart breaks at Luke’s words. He doesn’t wish to hurt him again, but this is for the best. “The kindest thing I can do for the galaxy, for you, is to leave it and let it forget my cruelty.” He glances at the alarms blaring on the walls. Luke needs to leave--before the station explodes.

But then the Force shatters around them, and the alarms stop abruptly, leaving behind an eerie silence. Vader’s head jerks back to Luke as the boy shrugs Vader’s hand off his shoulder. He’s almost shaking with rage, his hands balling into fists at his side, “Bullshit! And you know it!”

If Vader thought he could take a step backward without losing the precarious balance keeping him upright, he would. No one’s dared speak to him like this for decades. But some part of him rejoices at the lack of fear--enough to yell--his son seems to feel in his presence.

But then Luke’s hand comes up to wave in the space between them, gesturing widely in his anger, and Vader forgets his previous thoughts, “Get over your self-pitying  _ bullshit _ ! You don’t get to ruin the galaxy and leave without even trying to rebuild it! You owe it to all of us, to everyone you’ve hurt, to the memories of those you loved, to  _ fix _ this!” The Force punctuates every word with a stab of pain, of remembrance, of  _ truth _ . 

“And if you can’t find it in your heart to care about the galaxy yet, then at least do it for me, for Leia, for your  _ children _ . You don’t get to just give up!” He takes a shuddering breath, and Vader doesn’t have any words, eyes wide in shock, but it seems Luke still has a few more, “Now get on the ship before I force you on it!”

The boy’s breathing hard, but his stance is firm, his eyes still blazing, and Vader doesn’t doubt that Luke would force him onto the shuttle despite both their injuries. But it’s not necessary. He takes a stumbling step forward again, grabbing Luke’s arm for support, “Alright, my son.” Because what else can he say?

He can almost feel Padme’s ghost standing beside him smirking. Luke is so much like her.

The Force balloons with warmth around them, bright and shining, as they stumble into the shuttle, the ramp closing behind them. Vader feels the light spread through his veins, bolstering his strength. Some of the burning in his limbs fades, the ache of age-old injuries dimming for the first time in years, and incredulously he looks down at Luke. The boy just shrugs and smiles, looking no worse for feeding energy into Vader’s failing body. And he slips out from under Vader’s arm and rushes to the cockpit. 

Vader feels the engines rumble and the tremble of the ship as it lurches into flight just as the Force sparks around them, the dying embers of the Death Star swirling around them, propelling the ship further away. And he collapses onto a cot set into the side of the hold, allowing the bright, reassuring presence of his son a meter away to burn away the remnants of the clinging darkness. He may not understand his son’s faith, but if he has hope that Vader can help the galaxy heal, Vader will do everything in his power to do it, no matter the costs. The Force whispers her approval.

**Author's Note:**

> If you guys liked it leave a comment. They make my day! Seriously I love reading them so please leave me one cause they motivate me to write more! if you guys have ideas for other stories send me an ask on tumblr [here](https://www.tumblr.com/blog/imadetheline) or just yell about stuff with me. Info about me and all my other tumblrs are [here](https://infoabtmaddie.carrd.co/#)


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